Joe Millionaire
Published: January 27, 2003
CAN’T BUY ME LOVE
Rule number one: in any relationship, casual or intimate, lying is never good. “Joe Millionaire,” FOX’s new reality show, asks: is love stronger than money – and a lie?
Known simply as “Joe,” 28-year-old Evan Marriott is supposedly just a humble construction worker, making only $19,000 a year.
I don’t know much about manual labor, but I do know that construction, especially for operating heavy equipment, pays pretty decently. Definitely more than $19K a year.
And it’s rumored that he’s done some underwear modeling on the side to supplement his meager income.
But whatever his actual net gross, he’s no millionaire.
Here’s the catch: none of his lovely ladies know this. They all think he inherited $50 million over two years ago.
Rule number two: if you are going to make a show about relationships based on a significant lie, make sure your star tells the right story.
On a date with one of his five finalists, Evan let a reference to a bulldozing job from three weeks ago slip into the conversation. His date picked up on it and when she pressed about the exact time, Evan said quickly he meant two years ago, before he inherited his fortune.
Lucky for him and for FOX, she was apparently too wrapped up in trying to make her best impression to notice the disparity of his answer.
Rule number three: if your star admits to feeling guilty, you might want to rethink the premise of the show.
In the commentaries shown sporadically though the show, Evan admitted more than once to feeling guilty.
Personally, I feel guilty for lying to my dog about when his dinner is coming, let alone anyone I’m attracted to.
Rule number four: if all else fails, good old-fashioned flirting always works.
At the close of the show, Evan had to bestow jewelry on four of the five remaining women, a symbol of being selected to continue on.
So Evan, charmer that he is, lifted his eyebrows and grinned at one of the blondes. She smiled back and cocked and eyebrow.
I’ll bet Evan wasn’t feeling guilty then. Naw, he was just playing the seductive male every guy thinks he is.
Needless to say, the blonde he flirted with was given a necklace.
I’ve seen better soap operas here on campus. However, I will probably watch the season finale just to see how the woman Evan picks reacts when she hears of how she’s been deceived.
In the meantime, I’ll stick to more wholesome shows like “The Simpsons.”