American Horror Story

Happy Halloween, y’all!

Are you watching “American Horror Story” on F/X? You should be. It’s hecka scary.

Judge and jury are still out on the longevity of the series, but on a weekly basis, it consistently serves up a juicy dish of heebie jeebies.

Yep, heebie jeebies.

It has settled into the pattern of opening each episode with a flashback to a particularly gruesome murder (are murders ever NOT gruesome?) that occurred in the house where the main characters live.

Imagine every irrational fear, things that make you jump, open closets, et cetera, and then imagine encountering them ALL. THE. TIME.

“American Horror Story” stars Connie Britton (“Friday Night Lights”), Dylan McDermott (“The Practice”), Jessica Lange (Big Fish, Tootsie), and Frances Conroy (“Six Feet Under”). The show follows the Harmon family, Ben (McDermott), Vivien (Britton) and Violet (Taissa Farmiga), who move from Boston to Los Angeles after Vivien gives birth to a stillborn baby and Ben has an affair with one of his students. The family moves to a restored mansion, unaware that the home is haunted. Ben and Vivien try to rekindle their relationship while Violet suffers from depression.

They buy this beautiful but creepy house. Their emo daughter loves it, and it works well for McDermott to operate his psychiatry practice out of. (Ew. I just ended a sentence with a preposition.)

Enter Creepy Neighbor Constance (Lange), who keeps popping up at random, throw in her grown daughter Addie who talks to ghosts, a half-burned man who stalks Ben, a maid who is either young or old depending on who sees her, a murderous ghost in the basement, a few psycho patients, a scorned (and pregnant) ex-lover, and you pretty much have all you need for the best new show of the season.

My only concern is longevity. If it runs the way of the amazeballs AMC show “The Walking Dead,” then we’ll be okay. But if F/X expects “American Horror Story” to pump out twenty-two episodes this season or any future seasons, I fear the show will lag the way seasons 3 and 4 did of “Lost.”

Speaking of “Lost,” one of my favorite writers at Entertainment Weekly is writing recaps and feature articles about the show. His name is Jeff “Doc” Jensen and he did the same for “Lost.” You can read his musings here.

That’s it, I’m done. Just watch the show tonight at 8:00pm on F/X. Make sure you leave a light on, and have an episode of “Friends” on standby to detox your mind so you can sleep without nightmares.


Storage Wars

Last night when I got home from work, I opened the door to my apartment and my roommate jumped and sat up straight on the couch. I’d caught her redhanded.

I cautiously said hello, to which she just replied by widening her eyes, and stealing a furtive glance at the tv.

I followed her gaze.

Frozen on the screen was a shot from a tv show I recognized instantly: Storage Wars.

“You’re watching ‘Storage Wars’ without me???”

“It’s on Netflix,” she sheepishly replied.

We. Love. Storage Wars.

The premise of the show is (basically) this: when a storage unit defaults (mostly due to non payment), the storage facility then auctions off the rights to the unit. This allows them to clear the unit, as well as hopefully recover some of their lost payments. The bidders are (sometimes self-proclaimed) resale experts:  Barry the collector, Darrell the gambler, Dave the pro, and Jarrod & Brandi the newbies. They’ll bid on a unit virtually unseen (they can stand in the doorway and peruse for five minutes, but they can’t enter and no boxes can be opened or stuff moved around), and then the rest of the episode follows the four teams as they go through their unit, searching for hidden treasures.

It sounds simple, but it’s very addicting. And since the show films all over southern California, they’re visiting cities and towns that I know. And I can’t shake the feeling that I know or have met Darrell. He’s from San Diego (my gorgeous hometown), and he has that East County style.

Anyway, if you’re not watching yet, watch at least one episode and see if you don’t get hooked.

Like Dani says, it’s on Netflix.